Telling My Family

For the last year and a half, I’d been pretty tight-lipped about our efforts to have a baby. For the first year, it didn’t seem like anyone’s business, then when we started doing Clomid and IUI, I just didn’t feel like talking about our troubles. But IVF felt like a different, more intense beast. So I slowly started talking about it to my immediate family.

Of course, when you tell your family you’re going through something like this, they’re bound to ask a lot of questions and check in on how things are going (because they care and love you, obviously). I felt a little odd talking about it, sure, but I wanted them to understand the process – and it helped me mentally to talk through it out loud. But since everyone knew the key dates, when it came time for the beta results, my family group text blew up. “Did you hear back?” “What’s the latest?” “Are you pregnant?!” “Did it work!?”

Hmm. Sort of a drawback of being so open about the process. I lied and said that the results weren’t coming for another few days. Meanwhile, I thought about how and when I wanted to share the good news with my family. After the second beta test came back on Sunday with good results, I decided I was ready to tell them. I planned to tell my dad in person, then the rest of the family on FaceTime, as they were on vacation in the Philippines.

Joe and I had already planned dinner with my dad that Sunday night, so on Sunday afternoon, I was busy brainstorming the coolest way to tell him. I ended up at Swoozies, picking out my favorite baby book, Goodnight Atlanta, and a Quotables card that said “Life doesn’t come with an instruction book. That’s why we have fathers.” I also did a SUPER QUICK photo shoot with Disco, our labradoodle, and three pairs of shoes… then quickly had the photo printed at Walgreens (thank you Walgreens app!!!).

I hid my present until we got to the restaurant (Pasta Vino in Buckhead, for Atlantans), and after we settled into the table, presented him with the card. He read the front out loud (I knew he would). “Life doesn’t come with an instruction book. That’s why we have fathers.” Then he opened the card, to read, “…AND GRANDfathers! YAY! We’re pregnant!!!” He was so happy! He gave me a high five and shook Joe’s hand. I warned him that it was super early on… and he said the most calming thing. He said, “Well, anything can happen at any time. What’s important is that you got here.” Preach! So helpful. He opened the book and pulled out the photo… it was all so great.

We got back to my parents’ house, and Facetimed with the rest of my family. Everyone was so happy and excited! I wish I was able to tell them in person, but FaceTime was a decent substitute. I also got to FT my grandma!! She was so so happy too. She said she had been praying for me every night. There were lots of laughs and happy tears. It felt like a big hug.

The one thing – my family is full of big talkers, and Facebook posters, so I had to warn them multiple times not to share my secret on pain of death. I begged them not to, since we hadn’t even told Joe’s family, and it was so early in the pregnancy. So far, they’ve managed to keep mum about it, thank goodness!

We plan to tell Joe’s family this weekend 😀

 

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